Tuesday, September 02, 2008

all the reasons we're fat

Ok, below I outlined my problem with “RENT ME” limos. Among them was the girl hanging out the window, who is desperate to be seen. Today, while watching Fox News, I noticed the male equivalent of the limo girl. He’s the guy who rocks the bow tie. Bow ties aren’t cool and it’s going to take a major celebrity to ever make them cool again. Right now I’m looking at some fat, white, Republican, 30 something year old, wearing a plaid shirt and a polka dotted bow tie. The fact that the word “polka” is in there should probably tip you off that something here’s not cool. It’s your tie. Take it off.

In other news, I wish the newscasters would move on to other news. I’m not a particularly big fan of Sarah Palin for VP, but I wish the newscasters would move on about her pregnant 17 year old daughter. Nobody wants to talk about it, not even the Democrats. Are people tuning in to see this? This isn’t like the OJ thing where everybody was sick of it, but kept watching is it? People don’t really care about this do they? We got it all already. Her 17 year old daughter is pregnant, is keeping the baby, and nobody wants to talk about it! Not even the Democrats! So why are you still talking about it?!

Why too must I look at the empty convention center where the Republicans WERE going to hold a several day convention? For three days they’ve been showing it and for three days there’s been nothing to see but ten or twenty people mingling around. There’s nothing going on! It’s like watching a webcam or Big Brother at 5:00 a.m. Go back to the guy in the bow tie at least!

Finally, I took this photo while I was in the U.S. for my grandmother’s funeral a few months ago. Notice the white house on the left, and the blue truck on the right. They belong to the same person. Everyday that lady gets in her blue truck, and drives to work…………right across the road there. I’m not kidding. She drives thirty yards to work! As I’ve said before, Americans aren’t fat because of our food. Americans are fat because our portions are too large and we drive everywhere! And I mean EVERYWHERE!!!

Comments on "all the reasons we're fat"


Blogger shaunespencer said ... (2:43 PM) : 

While the rest of my plant-eating friends and I might disagree about the whole "it's not the the food" argument, it would indeed help if Americans would please step away from the video game "guitar" and remove their buttocks from off of their couches. [sarcastic tone:on] whatever happened to the day when kids learned to play an actual guitar and then stayed skinny by living off of cigs and rock-and-roll...[sarcastic tone:off]

On another note, now that I live in the American south, you wouldn't believe how many people think a bow-tie is reasonable option. The best is when the bow-tie joins forces with a blue and white striped seersucker suit. I don't see that as often but it is classic in a "whose idea was that really" sort of a way.


Blogger tarisayl said ... (6:29 PM) : 

The reporters won't let go of the pregnancy because they've exhausted their other methods of mudslinging. Don't worry. They'll come up with something new soon.

It's hard to believe your story about the lady driving to work. A friend of mine strongly encourages me to walk instead of driving as much as possible. When I lived in Harrogate I walked to and from town center (a mile and a half each way). I also know people who will drive around for half an hour just to be able to find a parking spot up close. Not only are they hurting themselves physically but that is half an hour less their car would have been spouting its nasty fumes. Sorry for the rant. I'm a big "park at the back of the lot and walk" person. I've never had to wait for a space back there.


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